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HomeOff Topics Jokes-Puzzles-Riddles › Obama the Turtle USA the shoe
01-21-2010 12:51 AM  8 years agoPost 1
oballzz

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lilburn ga usa

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02-07-2010 12:19 PM  8 years agoPost 2
oballzz

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lilburn ga usa

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On the way to accept the Nobel Peace Prize President Obama was stopped for speeding and was excited to learn he also has won the Winston Cup.

What's the difference between Obama giving a speech and a cardboard cutout of Obama giving a speech? The cardboard cutout looks at the camera instead of the teleprompter.

Now that the Obama administration has come to power, what do you call any intelligent people at the White House? Tourists.

The secret service code for the arrival of Air Force One:
The ego has landed!

HOW TO START EACH DAY WITH A POSITIVE OUTLOOK
1. Open a new file in your computer.
2. Name it 'Barack Obama'.
3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.
4. Empty the Recycle Bin.
5. Your PC will ask you:
'Do you really want to get rid of 'Barack Obama?'
6. Firmly Click 'Yes.'
7. Feel better?
GOOD! - Tomorrow we'll do Nancy Pelosi.

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02-07-2010 03:06 PM  8 years agoPost 3
vigorguy

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Princeton, WV

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Wrong forum, don't you think??

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02-07-2010 05:56 PM  8 years agoPost 4
misfits0311

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Santa Clarita, CA - USA

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The recycle bin idea is genius!

╘ₒ₲ₒ 6°° ƺƉ ṾЪ∂®

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02-07-2010 07:28 PM  8 years agoPost 5
ttsingram

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Lincoln, Ne

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Wrong forum, don't you think??
Looks like jokes to me.

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02-11-2010 10:18 PM  8 years agoPost 6
Jgatorman

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Birmingham, AL

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sending to all my friends

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02-12-2010 12:56 AM  8 years agoPost 7
oballzz

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lilburn ga usa

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Obama goes into a bar and starts pounding some
brewskis. Gets up to leave and the bartender says
“Hey, how about taking care of this tab?” Obama says,
“How much is it?” Bartender says, “Rounding down,
about eleven trillion dollars.” Obama says, “My
grandchildren’ll drop by in about 40 years to take
care of it.”

Bumper sticker: Obama in 08
Broke in 09

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02-13-2010 02:40 AM  8 years agoPost 8
oballzz

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lilburn ga usa

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A woman in a hot-air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below.
She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I
don't know where I am."
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.
"She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Republican."
"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."
The man smiled and responded, "You must be an Obama Democrat."
"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you are going.. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's my fault."

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