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HomeOff Topics Jokes-Puzzles-Riddles › 5 Winning Smart Ass Answers For 2005
02-11-2006 03:57 PM  12 years agoPost 1
HUTCH964

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Taylor,Texas 76574 local airport T74

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5 Winning Smart Ass Answers For 2005

Smart Ass Answer #5:
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check
tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed at her. Without missing a beat....she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

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Smart Ass Answer #4:
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
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Smart Ass Answer #3:
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop
said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a
ticket.

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Smart Ass Answer #2:
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, " Low Bridge Ahead ." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of FUEL ."
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#1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2005.......................
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shaking her head and sweetly said "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand.


*****

Tim

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02-11-2006 09:38 PM  12 years agoPost 2
webbhost

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england - Leicester

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lol im liking it

meh

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02-11-2006 09:55 PM  12 years agoPost 3
DOKEY

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Northamptonshire UK

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Funny

Ryan.

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02-12-2006 05:35 AM  12 years agoPost 4
Shortman

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Portland, Oregon

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#1 is good

Team JR
Team ThunderPower RC
Boca Bearings

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02-16-2006 11:18 PM  12 years agoPost 5
Delta

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Peachland, B.C.

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umm that was my high school english teacher.

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02-18-2006 04:45 AM  12 years agoPost 6
sunfm

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Chemainus BC Canada

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Delta
#1 joke

i was thinking the same about my socials teacher right now in high school

sound like somthing she would say LOL

and the others a great aswell !!

thanks for the post

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