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HelicopterOff Topics News & Politics › God Did Create Mankind.
11-29-2011 07:23 PM  5 years agoPost 9641
sks

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london

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you know, I don't want to sound silly, but I do think the Bible is ripe for a rewrite. you know, the kind of "rewrite" that happens every 500 years or so.

in our version we'll include some bears (spectacled, deranged, panda, polar etc. . ) and a ranting raccoon, and a squirrel, etc. . . doing what silly circus animals do - whatever that is. And we'll put it under the noses of the general population and it will filter down as the definitive text, and 2,000 years from now a version of Thomas, or Grey, or Dennis, or Gearhead will be defending it and what it stands for/says etc . . . and then in the discussion amongst the looney nutjobs will be someone like Richard Carrier who will trace the text back to this time when us jokers tampered with it. But like the nutjobs that they are, they'll mock and ridicule him and call him all sorts of names under the sun and defend their silly delusion to the death.

what a bunch of total, utter morons.

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11-29-2011 07:56 PM  5 years agoPost 9642
GREYEAGLE

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Flat Land's

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Cool :

You can always tell when they are getting hungry

greyeagle

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11-29-2011 08:16 PM  5 years agoPost 9643
sks

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london

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You can always tell when they are getting hungry
why do you care, you don't eat cooked food.

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11-29-2011 09:41 PM  5 years agoPost 9644
GREYEAGLE

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Parable : Dumb and Dumber --OR --Stupid is as​Stupid Does !------ & Swamie !

I do think the Bible is ripe for a rewrite. you know, the kind of "rewrite" that happens every 500 years or so.
Revelation 22:18-19
(KJV)

For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book, If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book:

And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.

We are trying to Help !!! Think they are even working on a Bible for Dumb,Dumber,- Stupid, & Really Stupid - { Pictures only } and the "Swami" Edition, If you seen the movie : Theirs a Alcatraz Edition

Translation's of the Word :

NLT : New Living Translation
NIV : New International Version
NKJV : New King James Version
ESV : English Standard Version
NASB : New American Standard Bible
KJV : King James Version
RSV : Revised Standard Version
DBY : Darby Translation
HNV : Hebrew Names Version
WEB : Webster Bible
YLT : Young's Literal Translation

Just has to be some thing in here for you to work with
Luke 13:6
Then he told this parable:...

If you are trying to claim that parts of the Bible which don't say they are parables, are actually parables, then why do you not interpret the whole Bible as a parable?

The Bible says what it says. If you cannot accept what the Bible says, the problem is yours.
Well really now ?? really ?? I wonder if Swamie was in a Tempest of a Storm and was asked to step out but slipped and fell head first into the stern of the boat maybe ??

Here's what it say's :

Luke 13:6-10

(KJV)

He spake also this parable; A certain man had a fig tree planted in his vineyard; and he came and sought fruit thereon, and found none.

Then said he unto the dresser of his vineyard, Behold, these three years I come seeking fruit on this fig tree, and find none: cut it down; why cumbereth it the ground?

And he answering said unto him, Lord, let it alone this year also, till I shall dig about it, and dung it:

And if it bear fruit, well: and if not, then after that thou shalt cut it down.

" Carpet Cleaning " Dumb, Dumber, Stupid, Stupid - er
And he was teaching in one of the synagogues on the sabbath.
I suppose that's an indication of the dishonesty of Christians in America, and why U.S. jails are mostly populated by Christians.
Even a FOOL is not Stupid :
GOD does not grade on a curve -for by nature ; in the Beginning : No ONE seek's after GOD !
Depraved minds WANT to have depraved minds- for no one can save themselves. They have reaped what they have sown -they planted their own seed.

Their IS NO such thing as a Victimless Crime !!! Most in Prison or " Cage's" are caught in their own WEB of Self Destruction.

How do you respond to the Evil in Your own Heart ?? Those in Prison are Men and Women whom have been De- Throned of SIN.

Their is HOWEVER many what I call {The Saved} or the re manufactured - Humpty Dumpty's The survivors of EGO ! After sitting in cage's Their Live's have been rebuilt against ALL Odd's except for the special Blessing's of the FATHER.

This group of Men and Women are : Devote Practicing Christian's, whom not only are {Saved} ( as in came too } : The CHRIST, they are a Loving - Gracious - Trusting - Teaching - Walking the Walk - Sword Carrying -Hard CORE practicing CHRISTIAN !

MERCY : the Beauty that is found in some of them !

I like to think their held in reserve You don't mess with A "Caged" - That's become Christian -Check the BOOK

greyeagle

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11-29-2011 09:56 PM  5 years agoPost 9645
sks

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london

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smile you crazy bear, you're going to be famous.

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11-29-2011 10:06 PM  5 years agoPost 9646
GREYEAGLE

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Why ??

{ THANK YOU } !!!!

Special Blessing's

Would you Like some Pie ??? or Jello ??

greyeagle

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11-29-2011 11:46 PM  5 years agoPost 9647
Thomas L Erb

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So Dusty does This mean the answer is no? You don't posess the skills or you just can't understand or what? I didn't ask you about the Bible but you inferred it. Tis is a general knowledge question to see what skills you posess. I guess you failed to even understand this simple question or refuse to because -- Why?

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11-29-2011 11:47 PM  5 years agoPost 9648
Thomas L Erb

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you know, I don't want to sound silly,
. Sorry to late

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11-30-2011 07:13 AM  5 years agoPost 9649
Dusty1000

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these circus animals read it "all" literally, dont kid yourself.

because if they dont the whole book crumbles around the christian movement.
They read it all literally, but they only accept the literal translation of the parts that suit them. The story about the dragon sweeping one third of the stars out of the sky ''down to earth'' is another example. That may have seemed perfectly feasible to goat herders 2000 years ago who thought the world was flat and much bigger than the stars, nowadays they have to pretend that's typology, or symbolic, anything except literal. Since if they admitted that the goat herders didn't understand that the stars look so small because they are so far away, and that's why the Bible contains such a ridiculous story, then that would cause the whole book to crumble.

Dusty

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11-30-2011 07:23 AM  5 years agoPost 9650
Dusty1000

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So Dusty does This mean the answer is no? You don't posess the skills or you just can't understand or what? I didn't ask you about the Bible but you inferred it. Tis is a general knowledge question to see what skills you posess. I guess you failed to even understand this simple question or refuse to because -- Why?
I see. Ok, if you weren't talking about the Bible...
Seems to me you just dont know how to read . Now dusty if you were to read a book and you were told some of writings in this book contained parables, examples of typology and other types of writings along with just strait writings would you have the skills to read and understand this book enough to give a report of meaning or concepts described in this book?
First of all you will have to explain what ''strait writing'' is. A ''strait'' is normally a channel of water. Do you mean ''straight writing''? Perhaps ''strait writing'' is a type I have never heard of. That's the first thing you would have to clarify before I could make a guess at whether I might be able to understand this book.

Secondly, you refer to parables, examples of typology, strait writings, and ''other types'' of writings. What types would these ''other types'' be? Braille, or hieroglyphics perhaps? That's the second thing you would have to clarify, since I could not tell you whether or not I could understand ''other types'' of writings unless I know what the ''other types'' of writings are.

Thirdly, what would the subject of this book be? If for example it was about advanced nuclear physics then I probably would not be able to understand it as I am not a nuclear physicist. So that's the third thing you would have to clarify before I could make a guess at whether I might be able to understand this book or not.

When you have clarified your question with regard to the above three points, I will be happy to answer it.

.

Now, what is your answer to this question?
Thomas, the few parables in the Bible are noted as such, for example:

Luke 13:6
Then he told this parable:...

If you are trying to claim that parts of the Bible which don't say they are parables, are actually parables, then why do you not interpret the whole Bible as a parable?
Does your lack of reply mean that you are unable to answer, or is it that you do not understand the question? If so, which parts of it do you not understand?

Dusty

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11-30-2011 08:41 AM  5 years agoPost 9651
Life_Nerd

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Right? Once you question and realize that the Bible cannot possibly be the 100% LITERAL truth that you had drilled into you as a youth it destroys your faith and belief in it as the word of an all-knowing and perfect Supreme Being.

This is when I switched off. No amount of gospel preaching using passages from this same work of fiction can change that. When I say fiction, I mean not 100% fact. Yes, there are some historical facts written.

OK, there may be a Supreme Being out there, and maybe one that inspired this book (don't know), but if that is the case, this Being is certainly not all-knowing and made mistakes or allowed mistakes to be made and allowed fables to be written in.

If you believe that the Bible contains 100% LITERAL truth (not translated or interpreted), then you need to have a second read while taking the blinders off.

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11-30-2011 12:06 PM  5 years agoPost 9652
helicopter

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Omaha, Nebraska

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Good morning to our blind Illinois flying buddy.

Coyster, you miss THE TRUTH because you do not KNOW
what the Truth is!

The redemption and salvation of the human soul from
sin and death is The Work of God our Creator.

He offers us Eternal Life and the Mind of His Very Son
our Lord Jesus Christ.

IT is FREE to us. But cost The Father the Life of His Son
bleeding to death on that horrid crucifix.

He was Dying there that day for YOU.

But you don't want to accept this fact.

Thus you live in the darkness. Unredeemed, unsaved. Blind.

See if you can possible discern what God means to say
directly to YOU HERE:

13 This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, explaining spiritual realities with Spirit-taught words. 14 The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit.

You mistakenly think that God is wrong. Wrong.
You mistakenly think that God cannot regenerate your heart
and give NEW LIFE to your dead spirit. (Given by Adam at the fall.)
You cannot SEE because you do not have
the Holy Spirit, which is God's Free Gift to you the moment
you believe HIM.
Thus 1st Corinthians 2:14 is True about you.
You consider the WORD of God foolishness and in error.
It is not in error, you are in error.

Bummer.

God has made a way to escape this darkness.

Take His Hand.

Or don't.....

You GET TO CHOOSE. <<< GOD's Gift to you - Free will.

I love gravity, it always keeps my feet planted when I fly!

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11-30-2011 12:13 PM  5 years agoPost 9653
helicopter

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Here, this might help you choose:

1 Corinthians 1:18
[Christ Crucified Is God’s Power and Wisdom ] For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.
.
1 Corinthians 1:21
For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe.
.
1 Corinthians 1:23
but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles,
.
1 Corinthians 1:25
For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength.
.
1 Corinthians 2:14
The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit.
.
1 Corinthians 3:19
For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God’s sight. As it is written: “He catches the wise in their craftiness” ;
.

I love gravity, it always keeps my feet planted when I fly!

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11-30-2011 01:07 PM  5 years agoPost 9654
sks

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london

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God has made a way to escape this darkness.

Take His Hand.

Or don't.....

You GET TO CHOOSE. <<< GOD's Gift to you - Free will.
yes, he did, didn't he?

He gave everyone a chance, didn't He? And everyone heard the same message and knew about it? didn't they?????

strange that the bushmen of Africa didn't, neither did the Mayans, or the native Australians, or the Chinese and most of the Far East??!! Or the people in India

because these people should have heard the message too.

moron.

meanwhile in my rewrite of the Bible I'll have to find cunning ways to put in a Panda and a deranged bear without the readers knowing that it might have been tampered with.

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11-30-2011 02:38 PM  5 years agoPost 9655
Life_Nerd

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Helicopter, you didn't read what I said:
No amount of gospel preaching using passages from this same work of fiction can change that.
You are the blind one my friend, but like I said before if it works for you then please stay the course. I have friends that need that beacon for strength. I don't want to be the one to kick that crutch out from under them or you.

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11-30-2011 02:38 PM  5 years agoPost 9656
GREYEAGLE

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Can't Get Much Funner !!!!!


Gentlemen :/: What we have here is a :

{VERY BAD CASE OF GRASSHOPPER'S}

greyeagle

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11-30-2011 02:53 PM  5 years agoPost 9657
sks

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london

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You are the blind one my friend, but like I said before if it works for you then please stay the course. I have friends that need that beacon for strength. I don't want to be the one to kick that crutch out from under them or you.
if a construct is unfalsifiable there's nothing anyone can do about it. I got angry with MPA as he got angry with me regarding this issue because to "prove" an unfalsifiable construct is "exemplified idiocy". It was only after thinking about it for some time did I realize that MPA was talking moronic crap.

All the religions we have here are not unfalsifiable in the strictest sense because they impose, and they make ethical claims etc. . . and Mr Carrier is completely right in exposing the nonsense that these constructs exhibit. Historical researches further strengthens the hypothesis that the Bible and other religious texts were at best written by deluded idiots and other idiots let their delusions run away with them, akin to being clicker trained circus animals.
{VERY BAD CASE OF GRASSHOPPER'S}
grasshoppers? or locusts?!!! Is that apostrophe suppose to be there?

have you've been eating cat food again?

I thought a large bear like yourself would be more into bees.

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11-30-2011 06:32 PM  5 years agoPost 9658
outhouse

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Coyster, you miss THE TRUTH because you do not KNOW
what the Truth is!
your a old X criminal

you have no right telling anyone what they do and do not know.

You lived a life of mistakes one after the other, now your too old to keep making mistakes and want that promised do over! so you beg like a dog for forgiveness

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11-30-2011 07:13 PM  5 years agoPost 9659
sks

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london

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this was suppose to be a PM to outhouse but​what the hell . . .

he doesn't have to does he?

he just believes in the Bible, upholds the religion and God has already forgiven Him as one of the clicker features of that piece of sh$t religion.

the more he desires for forgiveness, the more he needs to uphold "God" he's now transferred that responsibility to "God".

this is another aspect of the Bible I do not agree with, it's moronic in the most disgusting ethical sense imaginable.

if you've done wrong to someone/somebody ask for that person's/people's forgiveness. you have no ffing right to subjugate yourself to a "God" so He can take the fall for you. It's ethically wrong and moronic.

the reason why helicopter needs this "God" to exist and will defend it to the death is simply because he has no decency of asking for forgiveness from those he has wronged himself (either that or they are long gone which places him in a tenuous position).

those who believe in the Bible have no right to do this on ethical grounds. Your God does not speak for me. And the fact that you think He does is not only disgusting, it's sick, distasteful and nonsense. All of these objections can be only overcome if God shows Himself - He has not done so, so we have the right to hold our ethical position.

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11-30-2011 10:52 PM  5 years agoPost 9660
GREYEAGLE

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All hail Balaam and the other little Pagen

Just Love it ! Ole Helicopter can dial it up at will and on command thru the Gospel Ole Ballam must be low on the Shine or got a call from Mongrelville !!

Like a Mutt and a Mongrel Team : Ole Mozzy House alway's followed by Lil Pagan SKS;

Out House you didn't Drop out of Grade School -- Sound's more Like a Group of Franciscan Nun's in a private tried to beat the SIN out of you and they plumb gave it up and tossed you to the curb

Just love when the WORD of GOD grind's on the conscience

Definite Guilt - ENvie - or Pride

{ Nope : } You can't have any !!!!

Let's see next it will be the one whom can't determine what to do with a rubber band or the other one whom is still Philosophizing over the lint in his pocket

I'll go back and look at Heli's Scripture : Maybe we can find the one that REALLY burn's

greyeagle

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