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HelicopterOff Topics Jokes-Puzzles-Riddles › Nursery Rhymes we didn't have as kids
07-07-2008 08:13 PM  9 years agoPost 21
dazzaster

rrKey Veteran

right next door to hell

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Mary Mary quite contray
How does your garden grow
with L,S,D and ectesy and
cocaine stuffed up your nose.

Jack be nimble
Jack be quick
but jill prefures
the candle stick

A.K.A 509

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07-07-2008 11:30 PM  9 years agoPost 22
MattJen

rrElite Veteran

UK

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Richard Dijance used to do these nursery rhymes with a twist..

my favourite is the a similar version to the mother hubbard posted above

OLD MOTHER HUBBARD WENT TO THE CUBOARD
TO GET HER POOR DOGGY A BONE
BUT AS SHE BENT OVER
UPPED POPPED ROVER
AND GAVE HER A BONE OF HIS OWN..

DING DONG BELL PUSSIES IN THE WELL
HOW CAN YOU TELL?
BY THE BLEEDING AWFUL SMELL

All The Best

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09-23-2010 11:53 PM  7 years agoPost 23
LonR

rrElite Veteran

Macomb,Mi

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little miss muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey,
along came a spider who sat down beside her and said
"what's in the bowl bi*ch"
Thats funny .

600LE,OS55,OS PowerBoost pipe,Align 610's,Spartan

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09-24-2010 07:45 PM  7 years agoPost 24
mrted

rrNovice

Area 52

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There was a young man named Lamitter,
Who's di-k had amazing diameter,
But it wasn't the size
That brought tears to their eyes,
But his rhythm - iambic pentameter.

Old age and Treachery shall defeat Youth and enthusiasm

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09-28-2010 11:30 PM  6 years agoPost 25
Rockohaulic

rrElite Veteran

Canyon Country, CA, USA, 3rd Rock from the Sun

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Oh I wish I were an oscar meyer wiener,
that is what I'd truly like to be,

'cause if I were an oscar meyer wiener,
all the girls would masterbate with me!

Saturday morning I flew my helicopter in my pajamas
How it got in my pajamas I'll never know

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09-29-2010 07:01 PM  6 years agoPost 26
Tugnut

rrNovice

berkshire UK

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Mary had a little lamb
She also had A bare
I have often see her little lamb
But never seen her bear.

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10-05-2010 08:27 PM  6 years agoPost 27
Raptor Freak

rrApprentice

Auburn, Wa

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke a little reef.
Jack got high,
Unzipped his Fly,
and Jill said, Where's the Beef?

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10-08-2010 04:04 PM  6 years agoPost 28
dlakeside

rrNovice

Deering NH

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Mary had a little sheep she took it to bed with her to sleep the sheep turned out to be a ram then Mary had a little lamb :>

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